I am standing in a living room, watching Graham do school at a table. Older, but hair just as unruly and fantastic as ever. The warm sunshine is streaming through a back door into his workspace. It’s usually that distinct October light, but sometimes March. I sense we have a garden there. Or plans for one. Graham hums. I look over toward the front door. Bess and Adelaide are also older and wearing pillowcase dresses. Adelaide wearing braces and her extra wide velcro shoes. Bess barefoot and helping Adelaide cross the room. I hear a little guy start jabbering. I look in a mirror and discover a curly-haired boy on my back. He is in a woven wrap. Muted rainbow. Adelaide and Bess start dancing. Adelaide is shifting her weight back and forth while Bess jumps around her. Dave walks through the door and kisses me. A sweet ‘dada’ from Baby Boy Ballew interrupts us. In this recurring dream, I realize I am completely happy.
I’m not saying I’m unhappy now. It’s just such a pleasant dream. And that light streaming in feels like the epitome of happiness.