Tag Archives: family of five

Five Minute Friday {grace}

Confession: I am always a nervous wreck when I visit my husband’s workplace.

I am paranoid. “Everyone thinks you are at home doing nothing, while Dave is here working all day.” It isn’t an ungrounded thought. Someone said this to me when I was there for my baby shower. The guest’s exact words were, “You better stop popping out babies while Dave works all day. It doesn’t seem very fair.” I couldn’t even tell you what she looked like. She could have been blonde. Brunette. Short. Towering. Railthin. Big-boned. I don’t know. I was in a state of shock. I hadn’t even ‘popped’ out one baby at this time. We were planning on having 4-6 kids. Was this really how people viewed me? The stay-at-home mom who spent all her time sitting on a couch watching Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman. {The cliche is soap operas. This was the closest I ever got to soap operas as a teenager. Unless you count Saved by the Bell. Which was basically a soap opera for kids…} The next time I went, this time for a friend’s baby shower, someone said, “Wow. You look pretty! But you have lots of time to look good, since you don’t work like us.” Little did she know that it was the first time I had looked good in weeks. Caring for a strong-willed toddler wasn’t easy. I had almost stayed home. Needless to say, I have a {somewhat rational} fear of visiting my husband at work.

Yesterday, I walked in with all three kids. And I was nervous. I had just ‘popped’ out a new one 5 weeks before. And I still look 5 months pregnant. Surrounded by professional women with perfect hair and gorgeous make-up and clothes that actually fit them. I was wearing day-old maternity jeans. I realized right as we were walking out the door that my nursing bra was showing, so I grabbed my new infinity scarf and threw it on. After I had walked around showing off Elizabeth and talking to all of my husband’s co-workers, I discovered that it was still donning its tag. I had also forgotten to put on socks.

I am completely horrible about comparing myself to others. Many of these women, these polished women, are also raising kids. They are getting the same amount of sleep {or lack thereof} as me. If the women from the baby showers were there, they were probably thinking, “She kept popping out babies. She has a gigantic double stroller to prove it.” and “Shouldn’t she look better? She has so much time.”

I was having trouble steering the special needs stroller, Graham was telling several people about his wart, Adelaide was drooling all over herself and people’s desks, and Elizabeth was filling her pants. We still managed to have a great time. Because I gave myself some grace and realized that I will never be that polished mom who has all her kids in perfect clothes. My children have wild hair and lose their socks {a trait they apparently inherited from their mom} and say everything that comes to their minds. I will never be that mom who doesn’t leave the house without eyeliner and the same color of eyeshadow on both eyes {yes, I accidentally used two different accent colors.}. And I will always have a kid with special needs who needs to be explained to new people. And, somewhere along the line, I became horrible at small talk. Yesterday, I told my husband’s co-worker that Graham had already pooped on the potty twice in one day. She smiled politely.

There is nothing wrong with the women who are able to do it all and look amazing while doing it. I don’t harbor any bad feelings toward them at all. I admire them. And maybe I can be like them someday. I just need to start by remembering to cut the sale tags off my clothing…

159Our attempt at a family photo…

Time’s Up…

Five Minute Friday

Linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker for Five Minute Friday. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

1. Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Be generous and leave an encouraging comment for the person who linked up before you. That’s the best part about this community.

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Five Minute Friday {together}

Thursday, I felt like I wasn’t going to be able to hold it together. I am on three hours of sleep since Tuesday morning. Bess is sick and having a tough time with the drainage and discomfort. She is also still just adjusting to life outside the womb. So many sounds and lights and crazy faces from Graham…who vacillates between trying to injure her and love her to death. Both are dangerous and are making me a nervous wreck. Adelaide is teething nine teeth. And she is trying to army crawl. That is a blessing. It is just hard watching her try over and over again. She is determined to crawl and I am so proud of her. I still have that pain from knowing in my mama heart that it will take a long time. Keep going, baby. You can do it. Don’t give up. Don’t go back to rolling everywhere.

I got in the shower while Bess slept for 12 minutes. And I cried. The tears of a tired mom who just isn’t sure how she is going to keep going without either 12 straight hours of beauty sleep or the world’s largest Coke Zero. Since I don’t do caffeine until they wean, sleep is my only option. Bess is still nursing every two hours. And she has needed to be held for two nights in a row. All night.

This Mutemath song. This right here.

“I just can’t hold it together.”

I am off to get in a few minutes before Bess wakes to nurse. Or Graham wakes and asks to sleep in our bed. Or Adelaide cries out with teething pain.

I hate Halloween, but I am glad I will be able to get some clearance candy soon. I consumed the last of the freezer chocolate today…

Time’s Up…

Five Minute Friday

Linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker for Five Minute Friday. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

1. Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Be generous and leave an encouraging comment for the person who linked up before you. That’s the best part about this community.

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Five Minute Friday {laundry}

Eight loads of clean laundry, just waiting to be folded and put away.

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First time since March that all laundry isn’t washed, dried, folded, and put away. Twice a week. Tuesdays and Fridays. It was a good run while it lasted. {Much like that time when I said I was going to shave my legs every other day. Then, I woke up this week and realized I hadn’t shaved since before I went into the hospital to deliver a baby. One month ago.}

I am so bad about expectations and resolutions and goals and purpose and maintenance.

I am remembering what my mom said to me before Elizabeth came into this world. “You will need to give up on certain things for awhile. It is better to be a healthy mom than have all the laundry done. It is better to be a happy mom than have a clean kitchen.” She went on to tell me that the transition from two to three is tough. And I would wake up some days just bawling from being completely overwhelmed. I still haven’t fully experienced that, since another adult is with me at all times. I cannot lift or carry Adelaide. At all. So, I am never left alone with her. I have yet to care for the three kids all by myself. The first day that happens, I know I will bawl. And we will still be digging clothes out of that pile. That pile keeps growing, but I keep choosing ‘eat something’ or ‘shower at least twice a week’ over ‘fold the laundry’…a mom’s mental checklist is never completed.

Graham keeps asking me why our house is such a mess. I am trying. I (somewhat) clean up the toys that are left behind after Graham cleans, I sort and wash and dry the laundry, I wipe down the bathroom fixtures with a baby wipe, and I hide all the clutter that keeps amassing from lack of attention in a blue container in our hallway.

And for now, that is good enough. And clean enough. And there will be plenty of time to clean when Bess sleeps more than 2 hours at a time. And well after I have my there-are-more-kids-than-I-have-hands breakdown…

Time’s Up…

Five Minute Friday

Linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker for Five Minute Friday. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

1. Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Be generous and leave an encouraging comment for the person who linked up before you. That’s the best part about this community.

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Family, Fries, & Fun {and the corniest blog post title so far…}

Dave surprised us with a trip to Chick-fil-A. It was our first Joplin outing as a family of five. Elizabeth Mae slept the entire time. And I am convinced that those waffle fries were the best I have ever eaten. And we had the entire playground to ourselves…

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Welcome, Elizabeth Mae

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It’s time.

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She’s finally here.

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Our newest addition

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Elizabeth Mae

125Bess & Mommy

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Adelaide, meet your new Baby Sister.

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Proud Grandmas

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Uncle Hosea & Taylor

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Precious Bundle

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Bess & Daddy

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Uncle Greg & Aunt Leslie

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First Bow

173180172Full & contented baby

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Daddy & Bess Snuggle Time

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Adelaide & Elizabeth

Sweet Sisters

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Home

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Five Minute Friday {true}

I was engaged before Dave. His name was Juan Carlos Bautista. It was kindergarten. It lasted one whole week. I called it off because he and I had very different interests. And I was in love with someone else.

 

“Juan Carlos, I don’t think I can marry you.”

“Why not?”

“Because I love Larry Mullen, Jr. from U2. I have loved him my whole life.”

“What is that? I never heard of that.”

“If you don’t know who U2 is, then we definitely can’t get married. I am sorry.”

 

And I unintentionally made a five-year-old boy sob on a playground in Denver.

True story.

 

Fifteen years later, I ended up meeting a different drummer. He would play airdrums and we would sing Where the Streets Have No Name as we blasted The Joshua Tree and traveled on I-44 the summer before we started dating. The next year, we were engaged. And then he went from fiance to husband on a gorgeous summer day in 2006. And now we have three children. And our 10 year history is riddled with U2 memories. And there will be so many more in our future. Sometimes, I just watch him playing the airdrums in our minivan full of carseats and it takes my breath away thinking how blessed I am to be Mrs. Drummer. And then I breathe deeply and belt out a chorus with my love and our adorable backseat backup singers.

 

 

Time’s Up…

Five Minute Friday

Linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker for Five Minute Friday. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

1. Write for 5 minutes flat for pure unedited love of the written word.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Be generous and leave an encouraging comment for the person who linked up before you. That’s the best part about this community.

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